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[0:00] Well, good evening. And don't fall asleep on me because I'm tired or tired. More tired than you. I got up at 3 o'clock this morning, Eastern Time.

[0:20] So I'm going to see if I survive. If I don't, we can decide about that. Yeah, it's probably my understanding of some of you.

[0:38] You said it that way, almost. This is a message I didn't preach anywhere yet. And in some I was inspired by listening to somebody else.

[0:52] But that's how it came to me. But anyways, tonight we want to look at that a little bit and go through that.

[1:06] So we're going to start in Romans 12, 1 and 2. Romans 12, 1 and 2. I beseech you, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is a reasonable service.

[1:25] And be not conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your minds, that you may prove which is good, acceptable, and the perfect will of God.

[1:36] So we'll use that as the beginning here. In other words, you could use the part of that in Amplified, and say dedicating all yourselves set apart.

[1:50] You know, how can we do that? In our marriage, in our families, in our church fellowship, that we have a, that we won't that way. And we'll get to a lot more verses here tonight.

[2:03] And so are we fully, are we living that sacrifice life? Okay. Is that on?

[2:16] Yeah. Yeah. Got it. So that holy, living a sacrifice, living a life, or present our bodies in the living sacrifice.

[2:31] When we read the Old Testament, the sacrifice is something that was dead, but we are alive, and are we giving ourselves to that sacrifice? That we're living.

[2:43] You imagine when the fire would start coming, what do you do? Jump off the altar? Or do you go through the fire? And come out stronger than ever before?

[2:57] And so, that is, when we surrender our life to Jesus Christ, what all may come, will come. But I have no right to do anything else but to stay unmovable in Christ, in the love of God.

[3:18] And so, that's, we need that renewed mind to have that. Because many times when things get tough, we are in that age that we can look back to many things that happened in our life, and many things that could have done better, and many things we look really foolish to everybody else.

[3:43] Why did you do that? Why don't you just give up? I heard that more in the last couple of years than I ever did.

[3:53] Why don't you just give up? This is, it is, it is so, you were born in the 60s. Things aren't that way anymore. Who cares?

[4:07] That is not in the Bible. That is not the commitment I made. I made a commitment unto Jesus Christ. Back in 1982, and in the 60s, we're not part of that commitment.

[4:32] So, God didn't change because I'm, I am, I'm dead unto my, you know, I did deny yourself, take up the cross and follow Christ. It is like denying yourself, dying to yourself would be a stronger word for it.

[4:49] And taking up the cross and following Christ. So, anyways, tonight we want to start there, but there's much more. And as you were hearing through Berkland, then, and probably, many good things.

[5:01] And, and this, I'm not, I'm a student of him also. So, you will hear probably some things that sound familiar. I'm just not as powerful and fiery preacher like he is.

[5:17] But, I'll try not to be belittled. I love Berkland, his teachings. Okay, we're a living sacrifice.

[5:30] This summer when we had Daniel Kenniston there from Ghana, Africa, he would use the example, you know, we can say, well, I'm serving Christ. I'm not ashamed of the gospel.

[5:41] I'm willing to give my life. You know, what if you're out in the world today in a country that persecutes Christians, which it could be here too in a different way.

[5:54] And, so I want to give my life. I'm willing to give my life. And then he would say, then your wife comes and gives you the baby and say, change her diaper. Are you willing?

[6:07] Are you? A living sacrifice. That really challenged me in a lot of ways. We don't have little ones anymore. but, but, all those things come along.

[6:18] We can be spiritual as long as I don't have to do anything about it. And, our job is to run, surrender to it, to Jesus Christ. And so we want to look at that.

[6:31] Dedicating all of yourself. Set apart. I don't know what's going on. I know what's going on in the world today, but, I'm set apart from that.

[6:43] Thank God. how do we find God? God's will for our lives. And, by surrendering it, even if it, if you don't know what it is.

[6:59] You know, we're going to be married 40 years this year. there's a lot of things. I'm 25 years administered this year.

[7:10] I'm going to be 60 years old this year. I'm not ashamed of that either. I'm glad for you. I don't want to go back and do anything over again.

[7:22] The things I didn't do right, I'll probably do worse than the others. I'll probably do worse. You know, I don't want to. God has me here at this moment and I want to be that living sacrifice.

[7:33] Whatever may come, I will surrender my life to him. When we surrender, God has access, taking ownership of us and has lordship over us.

[7:48] It is now in his hands, even if I have it with me. In a sense, Abraham and Isaac, Isaac went up, Abraham went up to offer up his son Isaac.

[8:00] God asked him. Years ago, shortly after we were married, my wife was cleaning for a neighbor lady and she said, there's going to be a thing on TV tonight, a show about Abraham offering up Isaac.

[8:16] So we biked out. We were all older Mennonites. So we biked out to the house and we watched that pitiful, betrayal of Abraham complaining to God all the way up the mountain.

[8:37] They had it so wrong because they didn't understand anything of it. and I'm sure Abraham checked with God a couple of times, maybe, you know, I'm just imagining.

[8:52] But he didn't go up that mountain complaining. I mean, this is a little bit pitiful like a child. But anyway, so here was Isaac and Abraham.

[9:03] They were up there. He went to offer his son. God stopped him and a substitute ram goat came up there and they offered him.

[9:17] They both walked down the mountain again. But it was now proven to be in the hand of God.

[9:28] Sometimes we think if I give something to God, I won't see it ever again. We're not talking about that. That might be true for some things.

[9:39] But we're talking about that we surrender everything, you know, my wife, when I got married, I could have said everything I have, I have surrendered to God.

[9:55] But now I had something I never had before. I surrendered to God. Years later, when she was sick, she got, when we went to Africa in 2001, we got, we get tick bites.

[10:20] And we had fever at night and sweated it out. In the morning, our bedding was soaked with sweat. through the day, you got going again, you got tired early.

[10:32] But she has bad veins in her leg and she got an infection and got a fever. We were just there. We had no clue. We had nothing but God.

[10:44] I remember dealing with God all day long and she was shivering cold in the hot. and that evening to the native girls came and before I left for church that night, I prayed for her.

[10:58] Her leg was black and blue, purple, I should say. And as I was praying, I said, Lord, I give her to you because I don't want her in my hand because I was convinced in my mind it was over.

[11:18] She looked at me and said, is this the first time you give me a... don't do that to your husbands at least. I mumbled something she said and I think I did and I left.

[11:35] The reason she asked me that question is because she felt the healing go through her at that moment. And when I got home a day or so, a day later, she was well.

[11:47] She was recovered pretty good. But I had to surrender her. So what I'm saying, I just used that story for now, but it was nothing super spiritual.

[12:02] It was just putting her in the hands of God. And I still have her. But I know she belongs to him.

[12:19] also. You know, she belongs. Yes, we're married. God honors that. And we're still together alive that way and enjoying our life together.

[12:36] So that's what I mean by sometimes we surrender something and the only thing God wants to know, is this an idol to you?

[12:46] are you willing to give that to me? A lot of good things. I'm not just talking about it's easy. I hate that in my life. I want to get rid of it.

[12:59] Please, somebody pray for me. But what about the thing? I love this in my life. I know it's not right. Do I ask for prayer? You know, that surrender comes.

[13:15] we know what we need to do. And just to bring it to God. And he has to work. Sometimes it takes a lot.

[13:31] God has a plan for each one of you. And that's what I want to bring out tonight. God has a plan. And we sometimes look at it and wonder, what is his plan?

[13:44] Does he have a plan for me? Does he have a plan for you? Yes, he does. He didn't skip any one of you. If you believe he did, that's not from God.

[14:01] God, man looks at life in this moment. I look at life right now. Oh, I fell here today. I worried about this today. I shouldn't have.

[14:11] I, you know, this is, I don't know what God's doing. But God looks at the reason he created you and works from there.

[14:26] He has a purpose for you to the very end of your life. And he's trying to get you there. That's why he's working on your life.

[14:37] God. But we only see the moment. And we're so distressed sometimes because all of a sudden I don't feel God.

[14:52] But he's trying to get you to what he has created you to be. He is not punishing you in a sense. He is there to lead you to the place exactly.

[15:05] He knows the path. He knows why he did it. He knows the purpose of your life. He knows the ultimate reason that he has for your life. You imagine we go through life and we wonder what does God have me here for.

[15:25] And all of a sudden you do some good things and you wow that must be what I'm called for. I don't know. I don't even know what I'm called for. The ultimate reason. maybe I think it's that's over once I'm over.

[15:43] It's done for. But that's why we surrender to him regardless how it feels. Because I know, do you know, his plan is for your good.

[16:00] God. And so do you know that? You have to know that. You have to embrace that, accept that, surrender to that reality.

[16:12] I am serving God. I want to go deeper with him. I'm after him. What is the projection of my life? Am I heading towards him?

[16:25] If I stumble I get back up again. God. Because that's not what God had for me. I got to get on the right track.

[16:36] Because he has created me, has given me his grace, he has given me the Holy Spirit, he has given me the tools that I need to do what he has for me to do.

[16:48] Now you could ask, what if I don't know? Can I really do those things? surrender to what you can see today, yes there's a moment, we only see this, but we start right here.

[17:03] What is what I can do today? Can I surrender to that place, low sometimes, lower sometimes, and again lower, until we find, where do I walk in authority?

[17:19] you know, to say it this way is, you know, I want to be here, I have this ideal, and God's telling me to reach down to the lowest person, the most filthiest person, would I surrender to that?

[17:43] Or am I stuck on an idol I created myself? and some people work hard to support their own vision.

[17:56] I don't, I hopefully I never do. So God has it, he works from what he created us for, and you know, we look forward and say we have no good anymore, and God is working but I made you good, I made you for good use, and I want to get you there.

[18:19] when you read Elizabeth Elliott, when those five missionary young men were killed, I think there were five or four, there were five or four ways out here, but Barbara Barbara Vidarian, her husband Roger was killed, it was those Indians down in Ecuador, I think it was, along with Jim Elliott and the other men.

[18:54] Barbara Vidarian was a young mother, I think she had two children, after finding out her husband was martyred, said, I want to be free of self-pity, it's a tool of Satan to rot away a life.

[19:12] I want to be free of self-pity, because self-pity is a tool of Satan to rot away a life.

[19:28] I'm sure that this is the perfect will of God. Wow. Could I say that?

[19:40] God made everything that way. He knows what's going on.

[19:53] Later, the news reporter asked her about this moment. There was some conference or a missionary conference, I'm not sure what it was anymore. She was asked after having lost her husband and the future dreams along with it, when, they said, when you ask God why, what did God tell you?

[20:21] Barbara answered, it never occurred to me to ask why. I believe that was a surrendered life.

[20:35] I'm serving God. I enjoy the good, I enjoy the blessings I get, and I also will not turn my back when they're taken from me.

[20:58] Nate Saint would say like this when he was asked about that moment. His dad was the pilot. and people who do not know the Lord ask why in the world we waste our lives as missionaries.

[21:16] They forget they too are expending their lives when the bubble has burst. They will have nothing of eternal significance to show for the years they have wasted.

[21:29] them. They'll never be intimidated by somebody saying you're wasting your life if it's wasted on Jesus Christ because they are wasting their life.

[21:45] And we can at least do it on purpose. Romans 8 14 16 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God they are the sons of God.

[22:09] For we have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear but have received the spirit of adoption whereby we cry Abba Father. The spirit itself bears witness with our spirit that we are the children of God.

[22:28] This is what we have to this is what we surrender to. You know as many as are led by the Spirit of God they are the sons of God it's almost too simple to understand because it is it takes a surrendered life to understand that.

[22:48] Are we led by the Spirit of God? If you are then you are the sons of God. There's evidence there. There's something there. And we have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear but we have received the spirit of adoption.

[23:09] In Antithy that verse would say for you have not received the spirit of slavery leading again to fear of God's judgment. But you have received the spirit of adoption as sons the spirit producing sonship by which we joyfully cry Abba Father.

[23:33] And just to clarify I have seen many people misuse that thing. But we cry unto our Father. That's our source.

[23:43] We go there. It is not just a neat saying Abba Father. In other words in the real language it should be we cry unto our Father Father. Anyways but that spirit of adoption you know we had adopted five children we were we had to know a little bit about that there was nothing better than when they when they choose to surrender to your dreams and mission.

[24:25] It was really hard that they felt they wouldn't have had to they're not really from us. but that's who we are.

[24:37] We willingly submit to God via the spirit of God and his word is the same. And so we submit to that we surrender to that.

[24:50] and do we have that spirit that bears witness was our spirit. I think sometimes people are you know we need to know that.

[25:07] We are. It's interesting to watch little children or grandchildren nowadays. They know who their parents are.

[25:19] And we got to adopt their grandchildren too. But you hardly forget that. Because they know who their father is.

[25:35] They have accepted that. And they are trusting in that. That is what we do as our father. We can say I'm from the Summerlin family.

[25:49] we got certain trademarks. We got certain things. When I'm with my family I see myself sometimes. Not in the best way sometimes.

[26:01] But at least it's a good way to find out how others see you. But that's beyond the point. I am. I have surrendered to Jesus Christ.

[26:13] I might still favor my dad. And you know so it's it's fine. I'm not ashamed. But I'm not living that life.

[26:28] I'm living his. I have surrendered. I have died to myself. I've taken out the cross and followed Christ. I am living his life through me through this body that is made in an earthly image according to my genetics.

[26:47] But yet I am living unto him. He is giving me everything I need to walk the life that he has ordered. And it's by me to surrender to him.

[27:03] I'm in Proverbs 3, 5, and 6. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not unto your own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him.

[27:13] He shall direct thy path. Do not rely on your own insights or understanding. We're so much in love with ourselves.

[27:27] But are we in love with Jesus Christ? Because his thoughts are far above us. what he says. We can read his word and understand who he is.

[27:39] And I encourage you to read even when it seems boring, monotonous, tedious. Read.

[27:52] Because it is his word. Ask him to make it alive. because we cannot trust, lean on to our own understanding. And there's an interesting verse here in Jeremiah.

[28:06] Jeremiah 10, 23. Oh Lord, I know that the way of man is not in himself. It is not in man that walk us to direct his steps.

[28:22] in the end the fight he would say, Oh Lord, I know the path of life of a man is not in himself.

[28:33] It is not within the limit ability of man, even one of his best, to choose and direct his steps in life.

[28:44] if I want to get anything across this weekend, there. It is not in you, by yourself, to walk your own life.

[28:58] It is in Jesus Christ. It's all in Christ. And so, I don't know if I ever was aware of this verse until recently, for some reason.

[29:15] I never saw it this way at least. But I love that because so many people are trying to prove they're a man or a woman or you got to do this, you got to do that, and they walk around arrogantly around the world trying to parade their own self-built person.

[29:37] And God is, Jeremiah is saying here, it's not in a man. It's not in him. And I can tell you, it's not in man. It's not in me. That's why I found Jesus Christ.

[29:52] That's why I know I need him all the time because I know it's not in me to direct my own steps.

[30:05] So that's why I surrender again, fully surrender. it doesn't matter what happens, I will surrender to Jesus Christ. here, what I was quoting earlier, Matthew 16, 24 to 26.

[30:37] Then said Jesus unto his disciples, any man will come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it, whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.

[30:53] For what is a man profit, what is a man profit if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul, or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?

[31:06] We could open this up right now and ask you what men give in exchange for their soul. We would probably all have some ideas. we're not necessarily going to do that.

[31:18] But when you go through here, you know, if we do this, you know, deny ourselves, take up the cross and follow him, because whosoever shall lose his life for his sake shall find it.

[31:37] You know, that's what surrender is. You can't live a life without giving it up to Jesus Christ and walking his ways and what he directs you.

[31:52] There's so many things I can say that I can remember where God was, where we had to surrender to him, because he's the one that directed our path.

[32:07] many years ago, probably 35, six years ago, we started looking into adopting children.

[32:25] We didn't have any. And so we looked around. I was too young, and it cost too much money for qualification.

[32:37] my wife is older, a little bit older than me, but I was still not 24 years old, and you had to be 24, and $30,000 was not nearly, anywhere near our fortune.

[32:53] So we called the local agency. We saw an advertisement and asked them, we foster care. They said, do you know, they're mostly black children.

[33:07] well, we came out of an old order church where that was not, I was never taught against them. I kind of feared that they were known as big guys, but I know a lot of little guys.

[33:20] But, so I was not taught that they were, you know, it's bad, but yet it was something that's still inherited that is different. And, and so, we, we prayed about it and, Lord, show us.

[33:39] Is this, we, you know, our old order of bishop that Sunday got up and said, if you don't know what to do about something, do what Jesus would do.

[33:54] we both knew it at that moment. And we did. And the persecution came. But we had surrendered to that idea.

[34:10] We had committed to God. There was no going back. Did we weep a lot? Yes. Did we lose friends? Yes. But that's again a way where I see today.

[34:25] What is it that we didn't surrender to? That we think we're better than somebody else? You could say I'm not.

[34:38] Maybe most of us would have said that. So that moment came and presented itself in that congregation and it proved there was something not surrendered.

[34:51] We have to surrender it too. And keep it there on the altar. As our son and daughter did a very good job in winning people over.

[35:07] But again it just puzzles me to this day how much we can say you know I'm a missionary in a sense. But when you work with people I often have to watch myself that I do not betray since I'm an American I'm better.

[35:31] And I tell you what that's harder sometimes than you think. So I see something far deeper in a message like this. I see something far deeper to surrender fully to Christ.

[35:45] It's deeper than many of us can even imagine. I'm telling you that because I feel that. Because it's like this.

[35:59] Did I fully surrender everything? Did I lay everything on the altar and I'm not going to jump off? I am a sacrifice for Jesus Christ.

[36:11] Whatever he wants me to do I will do. that we took we broke racist ideas wide open.

[36:29] And in the very end when my son got married it was 28 years later when we got him. And the people I stood that day at the wedding watching my son hugging the brother-in-law mine.

[36:50] And I was remembering the words they said to us. What if I would have had to prove my point?

[37:02] I might have never seen that occasion. 28 years that's a long time to be dead to a revenge. if you still had it I'm sure I'm glad it died somewhere along the way because that was a long time.

[37:23] But I wasn't thinking about it until I saw it happen. Hmm. That guy said I'm not going to repeat it. And that guy said this.

[37:35] And there they are. They wanted to hug my son because he was their friend. it changes everything. You know I have a lot of sons and daughters in Africa and I don't even think of their color because they're family.

[37:55] And I wasn't going to get into that but I feel something how much how do I treat other people? Am I of a higher class?

[38:07] They're lower? do I see them as I'm superior because they are of this group? I think that's where we would be amazed of what we would see God do if we are sure that we have put ourselves on that altar.

[38:30] I'm going to love what God loves and hate what he hates. And you can read the Bible you know sure what it is. He created all men and he has a plan for every one of them.

[38:46] Yes, there could be different social statuses because of where they're raised. But for my part, the gospel and to be a friend without reservation lies in God has given us that but it lies in our hands to walk it out without coming I mean a little bit of a difference.

[39:10] I deserve this more than they do. Then my son and his friend went out walking. I'm just going to mention this a couple years ago when Black Lives Matter was going on and white privilege.

[39:26] His friend was black too. So Bernie and Kevin are out walking Sunday afternoon. They're good friends. They went for a walk in the woods. And this white guy came along.

[39:39] And he walked up to him and apologized to them for he being white. That is now the other extreme that is as wrong as the other.

[39:55] And my son said all we want. He didn't say it to him I don't think he could have. But all I want is to live a peaceful life.

[40:06] Let me alone. You know that's how you want. You know don't mess with it. And so I see there's a lot there that we're always trying to please man instead of God.

[40:22] So when things come along I can apologize for being white. I wish I could but I can't. I didn't make myself. I always thought when I look in the mirror that's scary.

[40:38] Doesn't have much color to it. But what I see in that in our experience is how much that is what sits in this heart of mine that was never yet tested.

[40:56] it is not in man to direct his own steps. Because I don't know was I tried in every angle yet?

[41:07] No. I'm still living. Tomorrow if I wake up tomorrow morning it's a day I never yet have seen. And I don't know what comes along.

[41:20] I don't know what comes along. Joshua 14 8 verse 8 and verse 9 Nevertheless my brethren that went up with me made the heart this is the 12 spies that went spying for Egypt and the promised land they went into and so this is Joshua writing about that event nevertheless my brethren that went up with me made the hearts of the people melt but I fully followed the Lord my God and Moses swore on that day saying surely the land whereon thy feet had trodden shall be thine inheritance and thy children forever because thou has fully followed the Lord my God so in the Amnified it says in verse eight my brethren fellow spies who went up with me made the heart of the people melt with fear but I followed the

[42:28] Lord my God completely I love that here they went into to check out what God has promised them this is going to be a land plenty milk and honey all those things they went and found it so they all said that but most of them said but they're giants and it melted the people's hearts they didn't listen to the two that stood Joshua and Caleb because they knew it was not in them but it wasn't Jesus Christ not in that time but in our language it was in Christ that we have the power to overcome and to do what was what is so disturbing here is they found the

[43:33] Bible the word of God we could say to be true do do do they did they think God is not able well that's what happened people lost their life because of that unbelief I believe there's a point when God can get angry and that would be one of them that we turn people away if we don't surrender our lives fully that we are for God if we have any other it's bad influence if we're not fully surrendered it will hinder and turn people away from seeking God I believe I have seen much of that in the last couple years how much are people were hindered when people say

[44:35] God didn't mean that he meant it whatever that is it's in here he meant it maybe we misunderstand it sometimes but if I am turning away people from seeking God God alone I remember when we were back 35 years ago seeking God and even people thought I should go to see the men of psychiatry you know head doctor I never did yet and I'm not saying there isn't a place for that either myth but they were saying because I was doing too much I was handing out tracks and every one of them had a kick back

[45:37] I tried my brother-in-laws but that was the wrong way to start probably but I wanted them to see it what they were doing was wrong I wanted them to seek God today we have a very good relationship as most of them that still are alive but but and I don't hold that against them but I don't want to turn people away from seeking God if they kick me that's another thing that's I'm on the altar okay I'm surrendered and but my goal is to see them seeking God my fulfillment in that and Christ would be to see them seek God you know many of us might say

[46:43] God doesn't want me to know what he has for me yes I think he wants you to know but his knowing most cases is the next step in front of you well we I don't want to do that I don't want to that that is not for me I want I want to know what three five years down the road I want to see that I want to plan that I I got plans I got big plans but yet I don't understand I don't even know how to direct my own steps but over the last couple years I have a message I preached one time that the next step and we were working through something there in our churches and I said maybe the next half step if you can't handle one step cut it back until you can handle it but we don't want to go that way that sounds like

[47:51] I'm losing out no you're not losing out if you can get a quarter of a step you got a quarter of a step but remember God has a plan for us he wants us to know and I feel more comfortable asking what the next step is than anything else God does there's a misconception sometimes God does not have a plan for me yes he does he created everyone that's his word it's perfect it's true God is like a smuggers board we go along and pick and choose what we want I hope you don't fall for that one then I would be in charge get it you know if you ever went to a smuggers board buffet you pick and choose what you want and that's sometimes fun to do that not that it happens too often for us but but I'm choosing

[49:02] God has chosen your life your path he has created it and he wants you to surrender to that and pray this way Lord I surrender I want to take the next step in your plan I trust you lead me because most cases after that you know their trials will come things will come but I have I remember simply over that period of time I was out in the barn dairy farm milking cows my wife sister came my sister in law she didn't go to the house she came to the barn and she stood there and cut me to a thousand feet and I stood there and listened on everything and one thing I was really proud of was my marriage and she took that one to town too

[50:25] I stood there she left she went in the house a little bit talked to my wife and when she left I walked in the house and said what did I do and I fell flat on the floor and left like a baby but there was nothing I could change except let it go because I was on guilty I was in charge I had committed my life I couldn't do anything about her in that way yes it hurts but there's nothing better sometimes after a good cry to know you're in the arms of Christ

[51:26] Jonas and Moses had excuses how did that go Jonas was saying I won't go there they're too bad he ended up in the belly of a well maybe some of you think you young guys that would be adventurous no that was a punishment Moses was the one saying I can't talk then he had to deal with Aaron and different things you know that he's not good enough that doesn't go necessarily well ever yes Lord I'll do whatever you have for me but Paul says in 1 Corinthians 2 2 for I'm determined not to know anything among you save Jesus Christ and him crucified and that's what I want to do to you that's what

[52:32] I want you to do to me know that that you don't know anything else that you focus on the things that Jesus Christ and him crucified in our life that's how you love everybody and yet not compromise one inch what God said I want to live that life that doesn't hinder people from walking and not melding their hearts to unbelief in the promises of God and again this is one thing that was really challenging over the last couple years there around Lungasher County which is really in TA very much a lot of religion a lot of know-it-alls this is how you do it but it's not good because

[53:39] Christ starts here it breaks us it brings us to the willingness to lay it all on the altar do I wish some things in my life would have been more better in a sense outlook yes would I want to change anything of how it affected me in a sense of breakage brokenness no I wouldn't want to I wouldn't want to relive those things but I don't want to I wouldn't be where I'm at today without allowing God to work through my life and as many of you know probably there's another thing I had to deal with there's always new things that come along to surrender our life year and a half ago

[54:40] I found out I had leukemia cancer you know when you hear that word it's easy enough to deal with it because you don't have to but when I I know where I was when it when I found out I wasn't looking for trouble I wasn't looking for it I was just in a routine checkup because of pre type 2 diabetic I remember sitting in that pickup truck that day centered New Holland New Holland I hung my head and I said Lord I can't do this I surrendered and from that moment to this moment

[55:42] I hardly think about it so you never know where we at how long do you have to fight kick and scream when something doesn't go your way before we surrender I'm not talking about that I'm just talking about looking in the eyes of God I can't do this what you can I surrender because I know I can't but he can that's what I mean by surrender that's exactly I'm glad I can say that testimony I'm really glad I can it's not because of me and it's going pretty good it's still there I guess but it's going good and

[56:43] I'm tired and that's usually a bad sign when I'm really tired I can't keep my voice up but tonight I think God was with me and kept me going because this is way past my bedtime in the east but anyways I'm going to quit but remember I hope I got the point across of surrender that is where life is that's where life begins because if I don't surrender and let all this garbage pile up on me my own ways or other people's ways if I don't get rid of that as I go along and say Lord here it is I love you more than those I let go so do that we want to pray here but we'll just and for my part here tonight

[57:52] I just end it like that but this is what life is God has given we were born here Jesus died because I needed a savior I needed a savior I was so bad I had to be saved I don't care how you felt about yourself and he came and did that and why do I think for one moment that I cannot live it out myself that's part of it of what it means at least part of it maybe the full thing to die to ourselves to take up the cross and follow after Christ and to render to that to render to things that come along to deal with them in another way of saying it

[58:57] I deal with it I'm not going to carry this grudge I'm not going to carry this bitterness I'm not going to carry this self pride or whatever I think I'm doing good because somebody said I am it's Jesus Christ he has a plan for my life because he loves me and he has a plan for your life because he loves me that is who he is those that can stand let stand and just if there's anything in your life that you thought about let's just surrender that there's so much like I said I don't know what I have to surrender tomorrow morning but I hope as soon as it comes I can let it go if it's true I need to deal with it if it's not true I don't have to carry it if it's true I can go to Christ and say cleanse me by the blood of Jesus

[59:57] I accept your forgiveness I ask for your forgiveness I accept it and if I have to make it right to somebody I will do not hinder your spiritual life we don't have time anymore never did but today as I see we cannot hinder other people we can have a moment of our own selfish thing rising up in our life we have to walk this surrendered life because we don't want to hinder other people we want other people to be called into the kingdom of God that is the gospel it will only come to surrendered people Lord Jesus we just come tonight and we just come before your altar your cross Lord Jesus we lift you up for all men to see that you are alive and well and Lord Jesus that you get the recognition not ourselves we lift you up because you taken us through this path of life down this path for the world to see even in troubles even in trials we will still worship you and

[61:09] Lord Jesus let that be true to everyone in this room tonight that each one will lift up your name regardless how they're feeling they will not refuse to lift up your name at any moment and Lord we pray for that we pray for a better understanding of these things of a complete surrender what it means that you had to die for people to be saved and Lord Jesus thank God that you did because we didn't have it in us and we know that and Lord Jesus help us to walk and find that place to walk in the fullness of Christ that we know all things are in him whatever comes our way that we will never pull back or hide out but always be standing there as an open target to man but yet lifting up you in the midst of people that love you and that hate you

[62:10]  Lord we pray that you make us men and women of God for this generation for this moment in time because the world is in a sorry state and tonight your church is the hope of the world we pray for that to be real in this little group here Lord we ask for that in the name of Jesus Amen Amen